Baby Syd

My Dad

This summer my Daddy had a stroke. Just writing that seems wrong. Something as big as that couldn't possibly happen to me. Things might get scary, but they always work out for the best. Right? I guess this did too, because I still have my dad. But I lost some of him too, and I can't seem to get over that. I feel like the most selfish person in the world when I talk about this. I guess that's okay though. Don't we all care about our own people the most? I guess that's what makes them our people. 

Dad has aphasia and he can't express himself. He can answer questions and he will say some things, but conversation is hard for him and he isn't able to express his emotions. He can't call me and just chat. He isn't able to be silly, which is a big part of who my dad is. He does laugh though, and I love that. 

I miss talking to my dad. No, I miss my dad talking to me. It's a thing I never even considered losing. Aren't those the things that knock the wind out of you the worst?